VOL. 1, TRACK 5: THE VAPORS, “TURNING JAPANESE”

Am I not supposed to like this song (or video) because it’s so culturally insensitive and appropriating? NAH. This is New Wave, people, so there’s nothing serious to be offended about. Besides, the Japanese here ultimately come off as far more dignified than the Vapors: the perverted, subversive Brits who created “Turning Japanese.”

We’ve all heard the rumors that the song is about masturbation, which is fair enough. But beyond that, “Turning Japanese” is a song about romantic obsession, which is a phenomenon that, clearly, the Japanese have no monopoly on. I don’t know about you, but I’d say a lyric like I’d like a doctor to take your picture so I can look at you from inside as well is a pretty forthright declaration of one’s all-consuming love.

But now imagine that you’re confined to a prison cell, with only members of your same sex to interact with all day, which is also part of the lyrical storyline in “Turning Japanese.” It’s no wonder Vapors are teeming with nervous, obsessive energy, the kind that’s become laser-beam focused on the object of their lust and infatuation.

I love how that nervous energy permeates this video. It’s in the dancing, it’s in the singing, it’s in the playing, but the Vapors manage to make this anxiety look chic and glamorous instead of cloying and desperate. That has a lot to do with the art direction and sets in “Turning Japanese,” which check a whole bunch of New Wave boxes.

Pink and lavender lighting? Check. Skinny band members clad in all-black? Check. Stage set that mimics a prison, featuring a grid motif that neatly doubles as Japanese privacy screens? Check. Camera angles that don’t stay confined to just that stage set, but rather, give us a glimpse of backstage? Check. Video quality grainy as heck, because it’s literally from 1980? CHECK.

I’m going to give “Turning Japanese” an 8.5/10 on the strength of the video alone: a true pioneer in the genre. Meaning, it was one of the first New Wave videos to air on MTV, so it set a strong aesthetic precedent in terms of being playful, irreverent, glamorous, and more than a little sexually subversive.

💘